I picked my son up from school today and he was upset.
As he told me what happened at school, the tears just kept coming. He felt absolutely horrible. He made a poor decision. He knew better. But he hurt a friend. Like, physically hurt a friend. He felt so bad. To top it off, the other kids said he did it on purpose and were threatening him.
He should have utilized his brain more. But, I know my child. It was very obvious that he didn’t mean to hurt anyone, especially a friend. He just wasn’t thinking. Of course we have had many, many, many, many discussions on how a person is always responsible for their actions. Always. So, a person needs to stop and think about what they are doing.
His tears were so hopeless. He felt powerless to fix anything. I asked him if he told the other child that he was sorry. He said he did right when it happened, but he didn’t think the other child heard him. He said he tried to explain to the other kids that hurting the child was an accident. It looked bad. My son did the action. The action shouldn’t have happened. And if he would have stopped and thought about anything, he would have chosen differently. I told him we needed to talk about this.
I emailed his teacher. I talked to the principle. And I messaged the other child’s mother. Mind you, I totally get. If I were in this mom’s shoes I would not be very happy at all. Her baby was hurt. And he shouldn’t have been. And my kid did it.
Tonight I am thankful that the other mom listened. I am thankful that she took the time to understand that this was not intentional. She went as far as offering to talk to her son about forgiving my son. I am so thankful. I told my son that she was going to talk to her son. My son looked hopeful. He didn’t want his friend to be hurting. He didn’t want his friend to hate him. And he didn’t want his friend to think he had tried to hurt him on purpose.
I’ve heard grace described before as greatly magnified and expanded version of forgiveness. That is what my child needed today. He needed more than forgiveness. He needed to be granted grace in a situation that he created. And the other mom granted him this grace. By not just forgiving him for hurting her son; but by helping to heal this situation by talking to her son. Tonight I am not the only one thankful. And I pray that her son heals quickly and fully.