Honest

I had to have a moment where I just came clean with myself today.

I am a very strong person.  I am a very positive and prayerful person.  And I don’t like when I can’t fix things.

We found out about two weeks ago that my child has scoliosis.  We are very fortunate, it looks like this is caught fairly early.  A dear friend has a daughter with scoliosis and knows a tremendous amount on the topic and newer, non-traditional treatments.  We are very fortunate to have a good resource.

We have doctor’s appointments coming up.  We have talked to the general doctor and had x-rays.  We are going to the chiropractor and focusing on improvement there while we wait for our consultation with the clinic.  And to make the general doctor happy, we are also going to have a consultation with the orthopedic doctor.  It surely wouldn’t hurt to hear all the opinions and learn all the information.

On a scale of life, this could be minor.  On a scale of MY life – this is my baby and this is huge.  We have so many blessings with this that I keep reminding myself of – the timing of this finding, and the great resource of my friend.  These two things alone are making this situation 110% better than it could have been.  But still . . . this is my baby.

I’m not scared.  I truly do know that this discovery was made early enough that we should get a really good treatment plan in place to prevent any further curvature and maybe straighten what is there.  It isn’t fear that I’m feeling.  It isn’t anxious that I’m feeling.  It is just troubled.  I feel troubled.  There is something wrong with my baby and I can’t fix it.  I can’t even get the plan in place to fix it right now.  But, we will.  We will get the plan in place.  And we can do what we can.  For now we have to wait . . . and I’m not always a patient person.

Tonight I am thankful for a moment of honesty with myself today that I do get to be bothered by this.  I don’t like to be bothered.  But I am.  And that’s ok.  As I drove around this afternoon I did a lot of praying, a lot of thinking, and a lot of being honest with myself.  We will have a good plan of attack soon enough.  And for that I am very thankful.

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