This is the blog that I’ve written and deleted several times over the past months, years, etc. I’m doing it! This time I’m not deleting!
To all the coaches, teachers, and overall well-meaning people concerned with children’s futures . . I pray that you never lose sight of the things that matter.
Sports will never be my children’s entire lives. They just won’t. They have their own minds, interests, dreams, obligations, responsibilities, etc. You want them to devote themselves 100% to your team. I won’t let them do that. They have to learn to wash their own underwear regularly and cook their own dinner. I don’t want them to ever have one thing in their lives that takes up 100% of their efforts. That isn’t healthy, and it’s really ridiculous to act like it is. Turn on a good old lifetime movie and you’ll see someone who is separated from their spouse/kids/parents because they gave 100% of their attention to work. Life is a bouquet, not just one flower.
(PS I also have a life besides catering to my children’s sports endeavors. I love them and I support them. But we also have bills to pay and I have to work. So I’ll do my best. But I do prioritize my time. This has been years now of this being misunderstood.)
School will never be my children’s entire lives. There will be things they just aren’t good at. I know that. You know that. Can we all stop pretending like an A+ is all subjects is a measure of anything about them? They come home and I tell them that there are some classes that they will just be happy that they passed. There will be some teachers that they just don’t click with. And that’s life. There are some adults that I don’t click with. That teaches them how to get thru situations when things aren’t all happy and sunshine. They probably won’t get an A+ in those classes.
Random people who encourage them that boyfriends/girlfriends, clubs, games, work, etc will be where they need to give all their attention; well that’s not right either. And we talk about this.
I’m not trying to cause disrespect here. I talk with the children about being respectful still to adults who share their life prophecies with them. And they are learning how to respectfully disagree. But, what about the kids that aren’t mine? Is there any harm in just admitting to them that this activity that you are helping them with is important; but it is not life. Life goes on. Wouldn’t that get a better effort from them? I can tell you my kids either get stressed, get frustrated, or stop listening. This is not a receptive learner.
Tonight I am thankful for the influencers in my children’s lives that understand that although they are influencing one area of my children’s lives; the other areas of their lives are still important! And I thank you all for caring about my babies.