I Wasn’t Quite Feeling Christmas . .

This Christmas season hasn’t gone as planned. And I was beginning to let it get to me. Maybe you know how this feels? There should be more time. There was more that I had on my to-do list. I wasn’t ready!

I was reading about the first Christmas. I would like to say that this instantly changed my mood. But it didn’t. It’s nice when a story has a divine light shed upon it. This wasn’t one of those moments though. I just took it as a reminder to try to keep things in perspective. But I still felt like not-enough for what the calendar said.

Then I heard a story. A true story. One that I will try to keep as vague, but detailed as possible to protect the people in the story while sharing the impact. A woman that I have known for decades leads a life much different than mine. She has a son who is closely like an autism classification. His mind is stuck at age 4, although his body has hormones and height of a grown man. His mom loves him dearly and takes care of him. She protects him from a world that doesn’t understand him. And takes measures to sometimes protect herself. Imagine a grown man throwing a four-year old’s fit.

For Christmas, this woman’s family sent her some fun things. Just little things of fun, enough to open one thing every day for a week. This woman has had such fun with these things!

And hearing about the fun that this woman had with such little things made me eyes start to get teary. This woman sees the blessings that she has around her. She never seems to see the things that her life is missing (by the world’s standards), because her life really isn’t missing anything at all. She loves. And she is grateful for the love that she can give in her life. And with blessings that God has given her, she is content and she is happy. And that is enough.

Yup, that hit me. I had spent so much time thinking of the things that I wanted to do or that I felt like I needed to provide for my family that I was missing the fact that they really didn’t matter as much as it felt like they did. My family and I had a talk. I shared this story with them. We’ve had a lot on our plates lately. And although our December calendars didn’t look like they normally do, we are so very blessed. I knew this before. I feel this way now. There is a difference.

Tonight I am thankful that the greatest gift is always love. The very first Christmas was a thing because God so LOVED the world – you and me – that he gave his son. And that will always be more than enough ❤

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